Thank you for bearing witness to my pre, during, and post-ERAS emotional reckoning.
Heart fluttering, pockets full of confetti, my head on your shoulder. I will forever be convinced that the best love stories start on the 10:45 MAX train home after a Kelsea show. Head over boots for you, always.
Pacing around a tiny studio + yap sesh = perfect date night.
File under 'Domestic Bliss': doing our damn best to fix the damn dishwasher. We didn't fail, we learned--both the anatomy of a Jenn Air and that we make a GREAT team.
Thank you for dragging Matt Golightly’s godawful tampon jokes with me, thank you for buying me pizza. Thank you for trusting me with the post-Fluffy feels (I had ‘em too, not gonna lie). I was so incredibly honored to be your date that night.
There were so many people in Salt & Straw that night, but when we walked in, I swear everyone else disappeared.
Remember how we obliterated all of Firefly in a weekend?! Pretty sure I only left the couch for snacks.
I had a ton of fun doing dinner at Saburo’s with Nolan and Brie. Thank you for making stepping further into your life easy and joyful.
POV, Mesmerica: ...simultaneously melted from the visuals--and you. D-d-did we both have the same thought?
We assembled a cat tree in ~30 minutes. No tears, no fears, only delight in my acquainting myself with the Allen wrench. I appreciate that you understand how transformative that is. And that you only ever discourage me from saying I can't do something!
Thanks for kicking it with me + my parents on the Fourth of July! I had so much fun laughing with you three.
One night, you texted me, asking how I felt about pollinated things. I replied with ‘I like flowers?’, admittedly a little confused. An hour later, you showed up, vivid arrangements in hand. Those beauties brightened my studio for days.
It wasn’t until I found a Reddit comment of yours that I understood what flowers meant to you, and I hope you understand what they meant to me. I want all of your flowers, and I promise I’ll tend to them.
TO BE CONTINUED! We are living 🎶 LEGENDS 🎶... accordingly, this is a living document.
💁🏻♀️
The Definitive Jeff Jar Companion Playlist 🪐🦋🎶🫙✨
35 songs for 35 trips around the sun. 🚀💫💖
👉
Open this playlist on Spotify
Starting Over – Chris Stapleton
You really are my
four leaf clover–and not just because you look cute as hell in green.
Bright – Echosmith
I love you all the way to JADES-GS-z14-0 (that’s 13.5 billion light years away, for those of you playing along at home). But I can’t reach that far! So imagine me holding up my arms: “I love you thiiiiis much”.
Lovely Day (Bonus Track) – alt-J
On a Mac, when pressed together, the alt and J keys produce a delta. Thank you for guiding me through some choppy waters, for being my sweet shore.
I Like Me Better – Lauv
I do. I really do.
What A Woman Can Do – Maddie & Tae
I could say I’ll support you ‘like it’s nothing, like it’s easy’, but the truth is this: true love isn’t easy, and easy love isn’t true. I promise you that I’ll show up. I’ll put in the work, even when it’s hard. I’ll make love an action word.
You – benny blanco, Marshmello & Vance Joy
I loved this vocalist so much in high school that I curated what was, essentially, a Twitter stan account. If only I could go back in time and tell 15-year-old Fi she’s gonna be fine!
shut up – Greyson Chance
Yap City. Population = Jeff + Fi.
Love Language – Kehlani
The most Eight Dates-coded track on the playlist gets Track 8. Sorry, I don’t make the rules!
Where You Lead – Carole King
First released in 1971, this track was reworked in 2000 as the theme for Gilmore Girls. The titular Girls are indeed goblins,though of the junk-food-eating/coffee-swigging/fast-talking variety. Can I be on their team?
Rather Be – Clean Bandit (feat. Jess Glynne)
Killer vocals, bouncy beat, STRING INSTRUMENTS—this song is a Jeffcore classic for a reason.
bragger – Kelsea Ballerini
Hotter than a Saturday night. Truly.
5 Years Time – Noah & The Whale
Hey, whatcha doin’1,825 days from now? Please say you’ll do it with me!
Everything Has Changed – Taylor Swift (feat. Ed Sheeran)
You give me all of the butterflies, always. P.S.: OF COURSE I had to reserve slot 13 for Miss Swift!!
Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol
One night, we were sitting on your couch listening to music. Maybe Spotify DJ picked it, maybe you did, but I remember thinking: this song is no longer corny and makes all the sense in the world. Three words, baby!
Dope – Fifth Harmony
I 15/10 would have sent this song to you early on. I lowkey forgot about it, and it resurfaced when I was putting together this mix. I’m so glad I get to send it to you now.
Understand – Hippo Campus
I feel like us the night of the Hippo Campus show is what they meant when they wrote this song–learning to know your partner, to communicate through hiccups, to just be fucking present for what is.
To Hell & Back – Maren Morris
Thank you for taking a chance on a girl with some serious smoke comin’ off her jacket (not my houndstooth coat though, I’d never recover).
High Enough (Seattle Sessions) – K.Flay
CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve made it to the eighteenth floor… I mean, track. But wait! There’s more!! Seventeen more!!
We are thrilled to announce, thanks to a generous donation from the University of Highland Shield and our musical partnerships with Leroy the Balladeer and Thug Life, our Playlist Expansion Pack (we’re still workshopping the name). Now would be an excellent time for a snack break and some tissues, if you don’t already have them. As for the restrooms, they are located on each flight—please do NOT use the Litter Robot.
Best of luck and remember, Jeff, to FEEL FEEL FEEL!!
Love You Like A Love Song – Selena Gomez & The Scene
I’d hit repeat on us every time. Loop, shuffle, autoplay, the whole shebang.
Oh, What a World – Kacey Musgraves
I’ll have what Miss Musgraves is having. Unless it’s acid. I do not want that shit.
Wild Heart – Bleachers
It’s those little i-really-wanna-be-gratefuls in the intro and outro for me. I knew I was taken with you the SECOND you first
said the word ‘mindfulness’.
Where You Are (Acoustic) – Tenille Townes
Let this one be a lullaby if ever you're feeling low. I will always come find you.
Nobody – Hozier
I could find every wonder mentioned in a Civ game and never see something as awesome (in every sense of that word) as you.
Snooze – SZA
I only ever wanna nap when you’re napping, because goddamn do I not wanna miss a minute with you.
All Loved Up – Amy Shark
You + me + that ‘killer view of New York’? Bucket list item right there.
Heartlines – Broods
In palmistry, the heart line is said to reveal a person’s emotional nature and approach to relationships. Can I, uh, read yours?
You’ve Got the Love – Florence + the Machine
J, I Love You, XOXO—here’s to a relationship healthier than any Gossip Girl couple’s!!
I Found You – James Bay
A gorgeous, gritty, heart-wide-open song that tickles my brain in all the right spots. Kinda like you do.
Carry Me Home – Morgan Wade
A sonic thank you to the man who held me up when I struggled to do so myself. I’m ready to walk. As long as your hand’s in mine, we can go any distance.
Colour – MNEK (feat. Hailee Steinfeld)
Let’s hear it for the hues, the brightness, the brilliance you brought back to me. Did you know DXM legit dims everything?
Hope Again - Zach Bryan
The numerologist in me selected this one, Track 31, as a counterpart to Everything Has Changed (...hope again // …dust off your highest hopes)! Please enjoy the fruits of my full-strength ADHD.
Fever – RAC (feat. KNA)
Oregon connection! The artist behind RAC (Recording Artists’ Collective) is based right here in Portland.
Lucky stars – HAIM
Counting them, thanking them, marveling at the fact that I no longer have to wish on them because you’re…real.
Verge – Owl City (feat. Aloe Blacc)
Owl City is, like, my go-to for hella-neurodivergent-coded love songs–here’s an offering with a tiny Avicii connection. And hey, y’know, we *are* on the verge of something pretty freaking epic.
Love Will Tell Us Where to Go – Bridgit Mendler
I wanted to close out this playlist with another directionally-themed offering. You’re my best friend, and you better believe I trust where this love leads.
Fiona Wilcox, HwB*
Partner-in-Chief, Infalligence Enterprises
Ms. Wilcox serves as Infalligence’s Partner-in-Chief. A legal professional by day, she strives to infuse her values–and heart–into her work as our in-house provider of hugs and head scritches.
Ms. Wilcox co-founded Infalligence’s Project 20:25, which aids rescue cats in finding their voices through provision of late-night wet food cans. She recently spearheaded That Tracks, a research initiative examining the extraction of wry remarks from Infalligence’s treasured President. Our Partner in chief
loves Celsius Essentials, television programming with an extraterrestrial bent, and Kiki the Siameez's new EP 'Thug Life'. In that order.
Perhaps Ms. Wilcox’s most illustrious venture as Partner-in-Chief here at Infalligence is, to date, a secret one. Drawing on her rich background in Highly Sensitive Personhood and deep roots in Acquisition of Special Interests, Ms. Wilcox has created a platform dedicated to uplifting one particular tall ginger with a surprise tattoo and a moral compass, a man at once fluent in Felinese and Fionaisms. Embracing a man who keeps his head but jumps in heart first, damn it. Honoring the stories he told as much as the stories we are going to behold.
Ms. Wilcox is, thus, proud to present: The Jeff Jar. A digital hub commemorating and celebrating 35 years of our inimitable Founder. A tiny corner of the internet decorated with grace and
glitter, fur and fearlessness.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY!
*HwB – Hottie with a Brain, obvi.
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